Friday, June 10, 2011

5 thoughts before bed

standing in a puddle as i watch my boys' swim lessons in the rain

1. some days i wish i had a redo button.  today would be one of the days i would definitely use it.  there were many many opportunities.  ever had that moment when in almost an out-of-body experience you wonder, who is this mad woman and what did she do with the real me?  or even worse, is this the real me?  i am sure my all too patient husband was wondering who this crazy wife was and how did she happen to show up today instead of fun wife.  some days i am so glad that tomorrow is a new day and that His mercies are enough to cover a multitude of sin.  i definitely am in need of mercy.

2. i am thinking about marriage. i am still getting feedback from my post last weekend on how you do not have to get divorced.  i am amazed at the willingness of people who do not know each other to share a part of their journey in order to allow us all to grow.  i am convinced that if we can get vision to survive in our marriage, we can also grow to the place of becoming best friends with our husband (or wife).  i am amazed even with the great relationship i have with my husband how so many times i can slip into entitlement mentality (you treat me like this... or else!).  but to put the shoe on the other foot... well, let's say ouch!

3. my baby is growing up and i don't know where the time is going!  my second most viewed post at this point is a sister maternity photo shoot my dear sister-in-love photographer took of me and my sissy when we were pregnant together (for the 3rd time!!!) and due only 10 days apart.  i hoped to have twin cousins born on the same day.  she had her wish and they each had their own birthday.  my dear sweet simeon is 10 months old and myriah documented him so perfectly.  i still am in awe of his red hair, blue eyes, and thumb-sucking sweetness.  sure, he doesn't sleep at night, but after 4 boys in 6 years what do i know of sleep?  if you can't sleep, look at his sweet pictures.  they promise to not disappoint.

4. people often ask me, so i haven't seen you for a while, what have you been up to?  i am always taken back by that question.  i have two routine responses: nothing really or we are so busy! 

both are true.

when you are a mom to four boys you don't always have a lot of exciting events to show for your time and effort, but somehow you are going every minute of the day at a reckless speed until you collapse onto the couch unable to move with the piles of clean clothes staring at you challenging you to put them away.  the couch wins yet again.

yesterday i was gone for 11 hours straight- and i don't have a "job!" (i know, i know, i know.  i was already corrected by my mom that i have the busiest job in the world.  besides my busy job, i also do teach piano and do little bits of ministry with my husband on the side).  my point is, however, that i have dedicated this time of my life to being a mom, so my answer to the above question seems pointless if the person isn't currently in the thick of mounds of filthy clothes to clean (i do have boys), noses and bums to wipe, chickens to feed, garden to tend to, gifts to make, piano lessons to teach, swim lessons to supervise so the kiddos don't drown, driving kids back and forth to do, school board meetings to attend, bikes to ride, books to read, meals to make, dishes to wash, groceries to buy, wood floors to clean yet again, attitudes to discipline, and cuddles to take because time is going too quickly and this mommy is overwhelmed!  but, other than all that, i haven't been up to much.

5. i love the summer!  i love the heat of where i live. (am i crazy?!)  did you know that one day a couple years ago, the city i live in was the hottest place on earth?  hotter than the sahara desert.  and better yet, my dear hubby bill was re-roofing our house that very day.  needless to say they took a "break" during midday as the tar of the shingles literally was melting beneath their feet.  i love swimming, the lake, the beach, the longer days, the bike rides, the kiddos home all day long, the sun darkening our skin and lightening our hair, camping, bare feet, warm nights, bbq dinners, garden bounty, and happy memories made.  i am so thankful it is summer. 

what is something on your mind?

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