Friday, June 29, 2012

undignified


word for the day:  dance

start.

sometimes it is all i can do to keep from breaking out in full blown dance before the Lord.  it is often at the most awkward times that my limbs ache to express the building pressure in my heart, bursting forth like a volcanic eruption.

i will become even more undignified than this... 2 samuel 6:22

i used to feel silly cranking up the worship music and dancing before the Lord.  i would lock all the doors in my little apartment in college and tighten the blinds.  i would feel the tension in my shoulders that a roommate may come home and walk in on my intimate moment with the Lord.

but somehow i couldn't help it.  the overwhelming overflowing love for Jesus just wanting to burst forth with my whole being.

this was a season during that college time, a dark night of my soul, when as a vocal major i had to go on voice rest because of nodules.  i did not know worship without singing.  i felt a hurting disconnect from the Lord.

yet i heard His small voice urging my heart to dance before Him.

worship Him with dance.

and so like david, even when it causes others to stare and giggle at my foolishness, i long to dance with utter abandon before Him and give Him the overflowing worship that is due His name.

even sitting in a quiet prayer room, i long to jump out of my seat and worship with extravagant praise.  the tingling in my feet to move to the rhythm of the music.

stop.

want to join in?  it is easy. i look forward to joining in whenever i can on a friday.



5 minute friday rules:
1. write for 5 minutes flat – no editing, no over thinking, no backtracking.
2.link back here and invite others to join in.
3. please visit the person who linked up before you & encourage them.

we have been away of a trip. - oh what a trip! we have been crazy busy but enjoying every blessed moment of being out here. - i miss my blog community!  i would love to hear from you in the comments! 

charis

Friday, June 22, 2012

wanting a fresh encounter


i am sitting in the prayer room at the international house of prayer in kansas city.  i cannot describe to you the feelings i have surging through my blood - in so many ways it feels like i have come home.  i am not sure if that makes sense really; i am not from the midwest.  it isn't really the location that feels like home to me, but the atmosphere of constant worship and prayer.  though we oversee a house of prayer back home, there is just something about just being here and not being responsible for anything other than being with God.  it is so refreshing.  i am struggling with the right words to write so i guess that is just how i will put it - refreshing.


our house of prayer is in a lot of transition and we don't have a building right now to meet for our regular prayer meetings.  i am realizing so much right now how much i miss it - that sacred place to go to just meet with the Lord.  He is moving in the midst of our community, no doubt, but i miss the gathering where everything else stops for the one thing of coming before Him.  no teaching, no conversations, no other thing but gazing upon Him and waiting on Him.  so refreshing.  it stirs my heart even more to just wait on Him and to listen to what He is saying. 

i am wanting to hear Him speak to me.  i feel like there is so much that has transpired in our lives over the past several weeks that He had my attention.  i need to hear His voice.  i want to encounter Him fresh and new.  i have already had many tears spill in the couple days here.



view taking off from vegas

the journey to get here with 5 kids was a bit intense - the kids were amazing with the full day of travel and we didn't lose anyone in the 4 airports we were at that day!  success right?!  no major meltdowns really either.

when we got into kc a couple hours late from delayed planes the place we rented a car from was closed and they didn't have our car there (though the lady on the phone told me it would be even with us getting in late).  in fact, they didn't have any cars there at all - a completely empty lot!

the only place open at 3am took pity on this little family of seven with sleepy kiddos and after watching us on the phones trying to figure something out, unsuccessfully, offered us this beauty for the price of an economy car.


yep, that is a good ole 12 seater.  isn't that crazy?!  these rent for much more than the minivan we rented and we ended up getting it for cheaper than we had paid originally.  crazy huh?  it was the only vehicle there that would fit our family.  otherwise, we could have been stuck at the airport for who knows how much longer.

we arrived at the house we are staying at 5:45am... so bedtime was 6am after the sunrise.  yikes!  but we made it and the kids passed with flying colors!  they were so great.

so here we are in kc.  if you think of it, would you pray that i hear from the Lord?  i have some things on my heart and i would love to encounter Him fresh.  thank you so much!

love you all.

charis

Friday, June 15, 2012

when you have already come this far


word for the day:  path

start.
this journey... you never quite know where it will take you.  sometimes it seems like the line for a ride at an amusement park that winds back and forth and at times seems like you are walking away from the final destination.

enjoy the journey they say.  enjoy the process.

i don't always enjoy it to be honest.

i look at the goal ahead and that seems worthwhile.  knowing Him.  being with Him.  found faithful.  counted among the righteous.

but the getting there?  i am not so thrilled about this back and forth road that just get tough.

who really likes standing in line for the ride?  if it weren't for the hope of the ride to come, no one would put up with the line.

i walk and walk and walk.  sometimes i run.  sometimes i fall and all i can muster strength to do is crawl.  but forward i must move because i have my eye on a prize and i will not give up.

my dad told me there are no quitters in our family.

i will not quit at this one.  i have come too far to have anywhere to really go back to.  i think of peter looking around at the crowds that once followed Jesus all going back home because of offense.

where would he go?  he had already given up so much.  so to press ahead on the narrow path - the sometimes confusing journey because he had to believe - i have to believe - it would all be worth it in the end.
stop.

want to join in?  it is easy.  (i have to say i went about 30 seconds over on this one...  sometimes you get on a roll right?  i am often surprised at what comes out through my fingers when they write against a clock.)



5 minute friday rules:
1. write for 5 minutes flat – no editing, no over thinking, no backtracking.
2.link back here and invite others to join in.
3. please visit the person who linked up before you & encourage them.

as always,  i love to hear from you in the comments! 

charis

Monday, June 11, 2012

one of those days



i am so exhausted!  it has been one of those days.  i am sure that you know exactly what i am talking about because we all have them.

i went nonstop for hours driving back and forth from thing to thing, knowing in the back of my mind that the house was a disaster at home and we had company coming over tonight.  i had grouchy little ones not making life any easier.  just when i would get a moment to hang up clean laundry something would come up - nursing, making lunch, grouchy 1 year old, the phone ringing, or time to go get in the car to drive to the next thing... oh my!

but i made it!  the day is almost over.

my frequent prayer today was: give me the grace to have the fruit of the Holy Spirit at work in my life today.  help me guard my tongue from grumbling and complaining.  (a few times i would start to complain out loud without thinking right in the middle of praying this - oops!)  i choose joy in the middle of this day because You gave me today as a gift.  thank you for allowing me to serve my family and help me choose joy instead of grumbling... 

i probably said that prayer, or a version of it, about 10 times throughout the day - every time i would start to feel my blood boil or my heart race.  self-control and patience were two fruits i was needing Him to grow in me today.  i am not afraid to pray for patience because i need it!

grumbling and complaining, the opposite of self-control and patience, have become all too natural for me as i go about my daily life and sometimes i need a roll of duct tape to just keep myself from sinning over and over again.  it always amazes me to think that an entire generation of israelites died in the wilderness and it was saved for the next generation to inherit the promised land because they couldn't keep their mouths in control.  Lord help me!

my allergies were such a mess today that it was easy to want to give myself the excuse that i could just be in a bad mood because i didn't feel well.  but if i can't be an overcomer today, how in the world will i be one in real tribulation and trials?!

so i choose joy and i choose to shut my mouth if joy isn't flowing so freely.

on an amazing note - the jeep was found!  i will have to tell you the story when i am not so exhausted, but i just have to say that God has my attention from all that happened with this whole situation.  even the way it was found baffles me.

whether He gives or takes away... blessed be His name.



still counting gifts to 1000...


673 - 682:

673. the jeep was found!

674. time with my husband's parents.

675. good company and talk time.

676. kids finally in bed and sleeping!

677. a better night sleep where i got into a deeper sleep than i have since hosea was born.

678. selling things on ebay and making room in the closets.

679. clean sheets.

680. our upcoming trip to ihop and to st. louis to see family!

681. surviving a busy exhausting day.

682. the prayer for patience will pay off.

i am linked up at a holy experience.

if you have a blog, let me know if you have a list of your grace gifts so i can visit!  if you don't, write something you are thankful for in the comment section.  i love hearing from you!

if you haven't liked this facebook page, you can in the upper right of this post.  i would love to keep in better touch with you!


charis

Monday, June 4, 2012

what an opportunity!


it is the home stretch of school and i am so ready for summer!  i am having a hard time with these long sunlit evenings to get the kids to bed for the early mornings.  i love to spend time with my kids and i am so excited for them to be home and doing fun things together!

to kick off the summer (though we still have 3 days of school left) we went cherry picking on saturday morning.  we filled 2.5 buckets of cherries and only paid $21.  after sorting through the berries i found we had about 17 baskets filled! i would way that was pretty good.  besides getting a ton of great summer fruit, we had a great time as a family.  it's memory making and a yummy way to make memories by picking fresh fruit.  do you know your farmer?

now what i really want to write about is the overwhelming absolute goodness and kindness of our God.  do you know His very real kindness in every circumstance?  i am rejoicing extra in Him today because of our present trials.

we woke up this morning to our jeep wrangler missing from the front of our house.  yep, it was stolen.  after all that has happened over the last couple weeks i have to be honest with you that i wasn't terribly surprised.  this is not said in a pessimistic way at all.  i have been asking the Lord to be my Rock that i build on alone and that i wouldn't be so attached to the things of this world.

just yesterday morning i posted on our facebook page (are you part of our growing community yet?)  a passage in revelation 3 that was a warning to one of the seven churches about how she had grown lukewarm.  in His incredible mercy and kindness, Jesus warned this church that her eyes had become distracted by riches and thinking she had all she needed in wealth of the world in the now.  what she did not realizing was the true broken state she was in.  reading this yesterday morning i prayed, God, don't let me be blinded!  i want to be rich in you and it that means breaking my grip on my stuff now, then please do it!

you see, in our house of prayer community and on this blog as well we talk a lot about having our hope anchored in the Day of the Lord.  i talk a lot about Jesus being my inheritance and my exceedingly great reward.  yet i don't want to stand before Him when He returns and find out that my life really was just a bunch of good talk without the reality of living the message behind it.  i don't want to have a reputation for being alive, but being dead on the inside (a warning Jesus gave another one of the seven churches)!

so today, i thank Him in true sincerity for the opportunity for my heart to be tested now.  am i willing to live the message of having my hope anchored in His coming?  i get the opportunity to bless my enemy and pray for his (or her) repentance and salvation from the lake of fire.  i get to ask that the Lord uses this not only to refine my heart and love for Him, but to draw the thief to Himself and ask that he would choose to leave his life of sin and follow Jesus.

of course i would love for the police to find our jeep and return it.  i would love for the thief himself to repent and return it himself.

but my hope doesn't lie in justice right now - my hope lies in the One who will make all the wrong things right once and for all when He steps foot again on this fallen earth and sets up His righteous kingdom.

this is what i eagerly wait for - and if someone takes my stuff i choose to rejoice in my God for He is good and He is for me and not against me.  He gives me the opportunity to choose Him first with my real life and not just with my words.  i get the opportunity to experience true joy and turn from the human tendency to get angry when 1 are wronged.

i know God will take care of us.  sure, it is our car, but it is only a car.  He has never failed me yet and i know Him to be faithful and trustworthy and in this too He is so so good.

you can ask the Lord to bring our jeep back (i am), but i mostly ask you to pray with me that i will be found pleasing to Him in the midst of this and that the thief would find mercy and salvation.  amen!

 so i thank Jesus for today as much as for our cherry picking day - all are gifts.

still counting gifts to 1000...


654 - 672:

654. supplies in my craft closet to make gifts.

655. the Holy Spirit moving my heart for the poor.

656. a family pass to the aquatic center for the summer.

657. my boys who want to be preachers when they grow up and are already giving their  first sermons.

658. praying with other women lift up each others' needs and desires.

659. fresh fruit of the summer.

660. cherry picking.

661. patience He is working into my heart.

662. tender hearts before the Lord.

663. bright blue sunny sky days.

664. the rain watering my garden for me today.

665. new ideas for the garden.

666. sweet sons who love each other as brothers and friends.

667. new piano student.

668. the opportunity to walk the talk.

669. His mercies are new every morning, so great is His faithfulness.

670. teachers who see my boys with the eyes of the Father.

671. our freezer to preserve the summer bounty for the winter up ahead.

672. He works all things together for our good.

i am linked up at a holy experience.

if you have a blog, let me know if you have a list of your grace gifts so i can visit!  if you don't, write something you are thankful for in the comment section.  i love hearing from you!

if you haven't liked this facebook page, you can in the upper right of this post.  i would love to keep in better touch with you!


charis
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