even the one

i know of a man who recently went to be with the Lord. about a year before his death, his wife had a dream that when he entered heaven he was greeted by the many many people that he shared the gospel with and led to the Lord. what a beautiful welcome into glory! can you even imagine seeing people in the presence of the Lord who you spent time praying for, sharing with, and discipling? a reward like that makes a life seem so worth all the hardship and sacrifice that surely came with it.

i lay in bed one night after hearing this story so moved by the life of this man who lived his life for the gospel, and reflected on the simple unimpressive life that i lead. my heart envied the life this man lived - a good righteous life that influenced others to walk with Jesus. i thought about my days - so routine, so monotonous, and without much reach or influence. laying there in bed i asked the Lord, "when i get to the end of my life, who will i have i even led to You?"

a sadness filled my heart - not the kind of sadness that is akin to self-pity, but the sadness of a child who wants to be pleasing to her Father and yet feels as if she has so little to show for her efforts. i am reminded of the apostle paul who said that the spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak. i just felt small and weak. my desire to live a life like this man was definitely there - but i wondered where was the opportunity to be faithful as he had been.

then i heard it as clear as if you were speaking to me, and yet it was that still small Voice that one can only hear with her inside ears:

"you are leading your kids to Me."

the anxious thoughts left. the burden of shame at the smallness of my days lifted. it was enough. the Holy Spirit reminded me that if i am faithful with the assignment that lays before me, it would be counted as righteous and the joy of His reward would be sweet.

i have thought back to that moment several times the past couple weeks. so often we envy others whose ministry and reach look big to us. these men and women are being faithful to what the Lord has laid before them, and He will reward their faithfulness. but the size of the ministry He has given us does not determine the eternal significance of His calling on our lives to lead those in our influence to Him. mother teresa said,  

"If you can't feed a hundred people, then feed just one."

i am not sure what the assignment is that the Lord has put before you. it may be so large that you feel small and unable to do what He has asked. it may look so small in the eyes of man that you wonder if it will have meaning in the end.

all i can tell you is this - He will give you opportunity to share the gospel with the one who is before you and encourage that one to live a life faithful in following our Savior, and leading even the one to following Him will have great reward for all eternity. we all have people in our lives whose eternity may be affected by our faithful witness of Jesus. He sees what men do not see. this you can count on.

charis

a couple thoughts for a monday morning

do not call conspiracy
everything that these people call
conspiracy;
do not fear what they fear,
and do not dread it.
the Lord Almighty is the One you are to regard as holy,
He is the One you are to fear,
He is the One you are to dread,
and He will be a sanctuary...
isaiah 8:12-14

here are a short couple thoughts for a monday morning. mondays are the mornings when i work on our family finances. i never planned on being the finance person in our family... it just worked out that way. if i had the choice, i would be completely ignorant of our finances and not have to continually be faced with how much we need God to move in our lives in this very practical way. but, God had a different plan than mine. as i have said in the past, i am on a journey to learn how to live by faith and not fear in regard to money.

finances are a really small thing in the grand scheme of what we have opportunity to dread and fear. there is so much that clamors for our mental and heart energy. so many things are saying, "look over here! fear me! panic! grasp for control of your life! i am worth your attention!" but no matter what we are facing, even if it is death itself, we do not have to fear what is before us. that is the way of those who don't know Him.

we are to fear the Lord Almighty alone. He is the One we are to fear. He is the One we are to dread. why? because our entire life now and for all eternity is in His hands, and it is His mercy we need to find life. these trials now are a drop in the bucket compared to an eternity with or without Him. no man holds my ultimate destiny - not even if they could make my life here really miserable or even kill me. only God is in ultimate control, and no man, disease, calamity, or type of lack can snatch us from His hand.

He will be a place of safety to those who trust in Him.

i know that i need this place of safety. i am sure that you are needing it too. let us once again let go of fear of anything else but Him and find that rest and safe place in the only One who is deserving of our fear and attention.


still counting gifts to 1000...

892 - 914:

892. beautiful weather.

893. being the featured blog here.

894. You can quiet my noisy thoughts.

895. my husband who really is a very involved dad. i couldn't do this 5 kid thing without him.

896. lots of opportunities to swim this summer with the kids.

897. having the kids around more with school out.

898. homemade strawberry chocolate chip ice cream.

899. selling lots of stuff as i clean out the house and simplify.

900. fresh summer produce.

901. so many friends having babies right now!

902. God doesn't measure my success the way i try to measure my success.

903. learning this imperfect parenting thing and meeting the mercy of God along the way.

904. picking blackberries and making jam.

905. creative ideas in the kitchen.

906. running a couple miles at a time... alone.

907. finding a letter from my dad to me when i was born in his office - reading it in his own handwriting and hearing his voice speak to me in my head. a true gift from heaven.

908. heaven is for real.

909. lots of time in the prayer room with our kids on these summer mornings.

910. tomatoes ripening in my very small garden this year.

911. living by truly breath-taking beautiful lakes.

912. new contacts after wearing my glasses that don't fit right for a week straight. so thankful to be able to see even out of the corner of my eye.

913. several days this june that it is cool enough to use my oven! fresh baked cookies...

914. turning off the a/c in june! unheard of... yay for open windows and lower temperatures.


i am linked up at a holy experience.



if you haven't liked this facebook page, you can in the upper right of this post.  you can also follow this blog or subscribe in a reader.  i would love to keep in better touch with you! 

please leave a link to your list of gifts in the comments and i will come visit your blog as well!  i love to give thanks together.


charis

what i am waiting for

a shoot will come up from the stump of jesse;
from his roots a Branch will bear fruit.
The Spirit of the Lord will rest on Him - 
the Spirit of wisdom and of understanding,
the Spirit of counsel and of power,
the Spirit of knowledge and of the fear of the Lord - 
and He will delight in the fear of the Lord.

He will not judge by what He sees with His eyes,
or decide by what He hears with His ears;
but with righteousness He will judge the needy,
with justice He will give decisions for the poor of the earth.
He will strike the earth with the rod of His mouth;
with the breath of His lips He will slay the wicked.
righteousness will be His belt
and faithfulness the sash around His waist.

the wolf will live with the lamb,
the leopard will lie down with the goat,
the calf and the lion and the yearling together;
and a little child will lead them.
the cow will feed with the bear,
their young will lie down together,
and the lion will eat straw like the ox.
the infant will play near the hole of the cobra,
and the young child put his hand into the viper's nest.
they will neither harm nor destroy 
on My holy mountain, 
for the earth will be full of the knowledge of the Lord
as the waters cover the sea.

in that day the Root of Jesse will stand as a banner for the peoples; the nations will rally to Him, and His place of rest will be glorious. in that day the Lord will reach out His hand a second time to reclaim the remnant that is left of His people from assyria, from lower egypt, from upper egypt, from cush, from elam, from babylonia, from hamath and from the islands of the sea. 

He will raise a banner for the nations
and gather the exiles of israel;
He will assemble the scattered people of judah
from the four quarters of the earth.
ephraim's jealousy will vanish,
and judah's enemies will be cut off;
ephraim will not be jealous of judah,
nor judah hostile toward ephraim.
they will swoop down on the slopes of philistia 
to the west;
together they will plunder the people to the east.
they will lay hands on edom and moab,
and the ammonites will be subject to them.
the Lord will dry up
the gulf of the egyptian sea;
with a scorching wind He will sweep His hand 
over the euphrates river.
He will break it up into seven streams
so that men can cross over in sandals.
there will be a highway for the remnant of His
people,
that is left from assyria,
as there was for israel,
when they came up from egypt.

isaiah 11

this is the day i am waiting for. when we just begin to believe that it is really real... wow! what hope. what an amazing time it will be when He is here again. His place of rest will be glorious...

charis

let's keep our eyes on the prize

the Spirit Himself bears witness with our own spirits that we are children of God; and if we are children, then we are also heirs, heirs of God and joint-heirs with the Messiah - provided we are suffering with Him in order also to be glorified with Him.  

i don't think the sufferings we are going through now are even worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed to us in the future.  romans 8:16-18 complete jewish bible version

to keep our eyes on eternity - the glory that will be revealed- is the key to endurance in the suffering of right now.  suffering happens so often and it touches every one of us.  no one is untouched.  but only to those who choose to follow Him and embrace being wronged and love like He did, like He does, will there be a payoff for the suffering.  but if we suffer with Him we will be raised just like Him.  and in that time we will never ever suffer again.  now that is something to be excited about!

i am linking up with barbie this week for fresh brewed sundays.

do you like this post?  consider subscribing to this blog and/or liking our facebook page to stay connected.

i would love to hear from you in the comments below!

charis

beyond

word for the day:  beyond

start.

i can't help but wonder how a human being can have so many deep desires and plans on his heart and somehow even begin to scratch the surface of them in a mere 70-80 years. 

a wise woman i know once told me that the callings of God were eternal.  that sometimes a prophetic word may not be fulfilled at all on this side of eternity - the prophesy might be saved for the crossing over.

i still ponder those words as they come back at key times of questioning.  but what about ____?  arises to my mind often.  the desire to understand how to fit so much life into so little time.

but what if the answer does lie beyond the time i can see right now?

what if our true calling isn't even unlocked until the beyond? 

for God cannot lie.  if He said it, He will do it. 

the beautiful mess that we live in may not look a bit like what we envision and yet...

and yet He is faithful. 

His mercies are new. 

we have a living hope.  we serve a risen Lord.  and we will rise too.

and when we step into that which is beyond what we are in today, then we shall fully understand in the looking back why He wanted to wait and work it in us deeply - because today really isn't all we have.

stop.

want to join in?  it is easy. i look forward to joining in whenever i can on a friday.



5 minute friday rules:
1. write for 5 minutes flat – no editing, no over thinking, no backtracking.
2. link back here and invite others to join in.
3. please visit the person who linked up before you & encourage them.

if you write a 5 minute friday, let me know.  i would love to come by and read your take on the word beyond.  you never know what will come out.


charis

there must be more than this

every once in a while I need a major wake up call that my everyday normal life isn't all there is.

i am not complaining for one moment about being a mom to 4 boys.  though i have had that ache inside at some point to explore other things as well, i don't have any particular itch right now to do anything differently off the top of my head (other than pay our bills on time and have enough money to keep up with the sky-rocketing gas prices!  can i hear an amen on that?!).

i wrestled for several months about my current season and i now really feel a peace and contentment about exactly where i am and what i am focusing on - my family.   let me me be perfectly honest, i have had many seasons when i didn't have this assurance that i was in the right place at the right time doing what i was meant to do.  though i struggled to find the peace, i just felt discontent.  right now isn't one of those times for me.  but even in this place of my life, in fact possibly especially in this place of my life, i must live with the constant awareness of the reality that there must be more than this.

there is so much on my heart that i would like to do someday.  i have dreams, goals, fleeting ideas of places i would go, things i would try, songs i would write, instruments i would learn to play, languages i would learn to speak.

i have always wanted to live in another country.

i have always wanted to run a marathon.

i have always wanted to write a book.

and yet, let's say every single one of these dreams inside are fulfilled one day (or even if they are possibly not), there still must be more than this. 

i get so wrapped up in the present life that so many many times i lose vision of the so much more there is and how very little understanding or awareness i have of it.  so much of my life passes by, moment by moment, day by day, and i fail to realize that at some point every single thing will be laid bare for all to see.   all the big things, all the little things, all the choices of what i said or didn't say, all the inner motives if my heart... they will all be seen.  they will be out on display and i don't know at this moment if it shakes me up more that you all will really know the inner workings of me or that i will look Him who created me in the eye and realize that He has always known it all along- the good, the bad, and the ugly.

and i think for me at least, when i get so focused on making sure there are clean socks, or dry diapers, or anointed worship sets, or prompt mortgage payments, or inspired blog posts i lose vision for what this life is all about.   i lose hope that even my heart can be sanctified; that the personality weaknesses that i have struggled with all of my life can be transformed; that i, even i, could be meek and humble instead of selfish and people pleasing.

when i start to think of this life as all there is, i lose vision for fullness in my own heart. suddenly the dreams to see the world, or be financially secure, or well liked and accepted become so much bigger than the dream of possessing my own soul.

where there is no vision, the people are unrestrained, 
but happy is he who keeps the law.
proverbs 29:18

i have once again become acutely aware of the darkness hiding in the depths of my heart and i am grieved at what i see.  i am still spending time in prayer, in the Word, and even in public ministry... but there are areas of sin i had lost vision of ever overcoming.  there are areas i did not acknowledge as even being sin, but simply a part of my personality.  i am deeply grieved that if i were to stand before Jesus today, i would have to give an account before Him and before you for losing vision for possessing my own heart and failing to present to Him what i could have if i had only believed it to be possible to finally be whole.

you have not yet resisted to the point of shedding blood in your striving against sin...
hebrews 12:4

grace is given that we (i) can have the means to finally be free.  not free to sin, but free to actually have the ability to obey and to love Him with a whole heart... something i have talked a lot about with little actual understanding of what it looked like in my own life.  

there must be more than this.

the fact that my eyes are once again open to the vision of this as a real possibility for me is bigger than any dream i could have for my life on this side of eternity.


charis